all odds against you

There comes a time in life where you come to meet an obstacle. This obstacle can be of any size, shape, or measure but it feels like the worst thing in the world.

I would be lying if I didn’t say that Sophomore Year was a test. This year in itself has been the hardest. It was the first year that I was on my own because my sister graduated and it all just seemed easier with her. Now that I am alone things only seem to get harder and weigh me down. The slightest stroke of disappointment keeps me on the edge, and when I do make a mistake I am a wreck. For I already know that I am a disappointment, but to know that I have also disappointed others hurts my soul. When that happens I usually go into an introverted state where I don’t seem to talk or do much. I guess it all started to happened when I lost my Uncle. It was during the middle of my first semester and then my spiritual Grandma at the end of that semester.flower purple.jpg Losing people in life is never easy… no matter what. I guess you can say it is a part of life and it is bound to happen to anyone, but if it were never intended to be like that then why would it not hurt?

Being a Jehovahs Witness helps me to firmly believe in a time when there will be no more pain. Revelations 21:4 states that prophesy saying “And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.” This is what I look forward to and hope that I get the chance to experience that time. I want to do my best to please the God I serve, so I can see my relatives again and finally be relieved of the constant hurt and pain that I feel. The weight of it all can be hard to handle at times and sometimes I don’t want to handle it. To ease the amount of pain I feel I tend to go to the fields to play soccer, but since I have a wrecked ankle I can’t even do that.

treeSo I have resorted to writing poetry because that is just another way for me to relieve the stress. It usually helps for the time being, but then it subsides and leaves me. I have had a good support system throughout the process and they have definitely been the reason I have got through this far. I owe it all to them because I would not be well without them.

Posted in OSU

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